I am following my favourite author's blog, Yoshimoto Banana's.

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Sep 18, 2019 23:11
I am following my favourite author's blog, Yoshimoto Banana's. In which she writes things like this: "Once you realised how you want to live your life, you have no choice but try it. That's the life."
How would I like to live? I asked myself and tear came into my eyes. I want to live a simple, happy life. People seem to want to live in their hell, and to hope other people experience the same things. I don't understand them.
You can't believe that, but there are so many people, when they have to face their problems, they instead start beating someone else in front of them. That's just because they're quite certain that the person won't beat them back. I mean teachers who are beaten. Children are not angels and parents are not embodiment of virtues. I've seen many teachers quit, or at least becoming defensive, cynical, indifferent, or corrupt. For me, it sometimes feels hard when parents get insane, I hardly remember how to smile. I am trying to remind of having to be positive. I don't want to be drawn into someone else's hell, wasting my own life. I won't call it dedication or contribution.
It's autumn around here again. My favourite season has started. Go see beautiful things of autumn. I need time to retrieve myself.
「どう生きたいか、どう書きたいかの結論が出たら、もうやるしかないので ~中略~ それが生きてるってことですものね」
どう生きたいか? 考えたら涙が出てきた。私は幸せになりたい。シンプルに生きたい。なのに、なぜか人生って難しい。なんで、自分が苦しいからって、他人を同じところへ引きずりおろそうとする人がいるのか、私には理解できない。